BDSM Abuse Survivors’ Network
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Top Posts
- 20 Traits of the Malignant Narcissist
- A Field Guide to Creepy Dom
- About kinkylittlegirl
- About This Blog
- Tolerating Criminal Behavior in the Scene, and Judging Others
- BDSM Abuse Survivors' Network
- What To Do About a Dangerous Top? What If They Are a Community Leader?
- Fetlife, Alt, and Other Thread Links
- Trust, Safety, and Surrender
- The 15 Characteristics of Verbal Abuse
Archives
* BDSM vs Abuse
- Abuse Among the Kinky, part 1: 6 Ways to Think About Abuse
- Abuse Among the Kinky, Part 2: 10 Things to Do to Reduce Abusive Behaviour In the S/m World*
- Abuse Articles
- Abuse vs Consensual BDSM (Fetish Information Exchange)
- Abuse vs Consensual BDSM/Erotic Power Exchange
- Am I Being Abused? – various questions to ask yourself and major red flags
- ‘Morning After’ Regret – Fourth in a Series on Predatory Behavior
- BDSM vs Abuse
- BDSM vs Abuse by SirBamm!
- Defining It – First In a Series On Predatory Behavior
- Domestic Violence in the S/M Community (Pandora's Project)
- How to Avoid Problem People (expanded and edited)
- How to Avoid Problem People (original with discussion)
- How to Spot an Abuser
- Is It Abuse?
- Is It SM or Abuse?
- Kink Abuse
- Leather Leadership Conference SM vs Abuse Policy Statement
- Lesbian Sex Mafia – The Difference Between SM and Abuse
- Meet the Predators – from the Yes Means Yes blog (about rape)
- National Leather Association Domestic Violence Project (NLAIDV Project)
- Personal Responsibility – Third in a Series on Predatory Behavior
- Reactions to Abuse
- Sociopaths in the Scene
- The Differences Between BDSM and Abuse
- The War Against False Entitlement – Second in a Series on Predatory Behavior
- Unhealthy Control – Warning Signs of the Non Dominant
- What do they look like? – Fifth in a Series on Predatory Behavior
- What Is Partner Abuse? – from The Network/La Red
- WomensLaw.org
Abuse - General
- ! Domestic Violence and Abuse: Signs of Abuse and Abusive Relationships (HelpGuide.org)
- AARDVARC.org – An Abuse, Rape and Domestic Violence Aid and Resource Collection
- Abuse and Recovery Resources
- Abuse Articles
- Abuse Signs and Look Out For Men Who…
- Abuse Types
- Abused or Codependant?
- Abusive Cycle – for abusers and victims
- Abusive Relationships – 23 Warning Signs
- ACADV Links to Other Internet Resources
- Adult Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse (various papers)
- Am I Being Abused? – various questions to ask yourself and major red flags
- Animal Abuse and Youth Violence
- Are You Dating a Loser? Identifying Losers, Controllers and Abusers in Relationships
- Are You Emotionally Abused?
- Articles About Abuse and Control
- Avoiding the Emotional Blackmailer
- Barriers To Leaving
- Blooming Lotus – Journey to Recovery From Childhood Abuse
- Bullying
- Characteristics of a Misogynist
- Definitions of Sexual Assault and Rape (nonlegal as well as legal)
- Emotional Abuse and Characteristics of Emotional Abusers
- Emotional Abusers
- Emotional Blackmailers: Jerks who Fuck with Your Mind – and Your Compassion
- Female Sex Offenders – Survivors' Safehouse
- Feministing
- Frequently Asked Questions About Verbal Abuse
- Gift From Within
- Health Effects of Family Violence
- How to Avoid Problem People (expanded and edited)
- How to Spot an Abuser
- How to Tell if They Are Not Changing Their Abusive Behavior
- Intimate Partner Abuse Against Men
- Love and Stockholm Syndrome: The Mystery of Loving an Abuser
- Meet the Predators – from the Yes Means Yes blog (about rape)
- Myths About Domestic Violence
- National Coalition Against Domestic Violence
- Parent Abuse by Teenage Children
- Parent Abuse by Teenage Children (overview)
- Pets As Pawns In Domestic Violence
- Purple Hearts 4 Butterflies
- RAINN – Rape, Abuse and Incest National Network
- Reactions to Abuse
- Relationship Red Flags
- Signs of Verbal and Emotional Abuse
- Signs That He Has Changed
- Signs That He Has Not Changed
- Spousal Abuse Facts
- The Abuse of Animals and Domestic Violence
- The Both/And of the Porn Wars
- The Cycle of Abuse
- The Manipulator Files
- The RED FLAG List – Warning signs that He (or She) is BAD NEWS…
- Understanding Abuse and Control
- Understanding the Victims of Spousal Abuse
- Various articles on abuse, dating, infidelity, and relationships
- Warning Signs of an Abuser (Mid-Valley Women's Crisis Service)
- Warning Signs of an Abusive Personality
- What are the red flags in a relationship a professional looks for?
- What Is Partner Abuse? – from The Network/La Red
- When Mr. Right Turns Out to Be Mr. Wrong (Romeo's Bleeding)
- Why Abusers Batter & Characteristics of Batterers
- WomensLaw.org
- You Think That You Are So Special… . . . that it won't happen to you. He'll be different with you.
Abuse - Getting Help & Staying Safe
- AARDVARC.org – An Abuse, Rape and Domestic Violence Aid and Resource Collection
- Barriers To Leaving
- BDSM vs Abuse by SirBamm!
- Domestic Violence Resources – all of US & some international
- Female Sex Offenders – Survivors' Safehouse
- How Can I Help My Friend?
- How to Help a Survivor
- How to Help An Assaulted Woman
- http://Computer&InternetSafety
- Internet and Email Safety – Covering Your Tracks
- Kink Aware Professionals
- Making a Safety Plan
- Manalive (and Womanalive)
- National Coalition Against Domestic Violence
- National Domestic Violence Hotline
- National Safecall Network
- Plan For Your Safety
- Victim Bashing
- WomensLaw.org
Abuse and the Law
Animal Abuse and Domestic Violence
BDSM - General
BDSM and the Law
BDSM Basics
Bestiality - Animal Sexual Abuse and Forced Bestiality
- Aftereffects of Animal Rape
- Animal Abuse and Youth Violence
- Animal Rape Links
- Animal Sexual Abuse Fact Sheet
- Bestiality aka Zoophilia
- Bestiality Statistics
- Blooming Lotus – Journey to Recovery From Childhood Abuse
- Diseases From Sex With Animals
- For survivors whose sexual abuse involved forced sexual contact with animals (Pandora's Project)
- Lecture addresses nature of bestiality: Criminology professor explains definition, criminality of bestiality
- Sexual Abuse of Animals Is Animal Cruelty
- StopBestiality
- The Abuse of Animals and Domestic Violence
- The International Handbook of Animal Abuse and Cruelty: Theory, Research, and Application
Blogroll
- BDSM Bad Advice
- Beyond the Hills
- Charlie Glickman – Adult Sexuality Education
- Devastating Yet Inconsequential
- Domestic Servitude
- Dreamwalker
- Freaksexual
- Gentle Spirit
- Kink In Motion
- Kink On Tap
- Libida
- Sadistic Excess
- Sayninee
- Sex Geek
- Sexual Intelligence
- SF Girls of Leather
- The Eroticist
- The Iron Gate
- The Mistress Manual
- The Perverted Negress
- Under His Hand
- Walking the Labyrinth
- Zille de Feu's Fetish Fantasies
Children and Teens
- Abuse and Recovery Resources
- Abuse Articles
- Adult Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse (various papers)
- Animal Abuse and Youth Violence
- Blooming Lotus – Journey to Recovery From Childhood Abuse
- Child Abuse & Neglect (various papers)
- Child Sexual Abuse (variety of articles)
- Dating Violence
- Effects of Domestic Violence On Children
- Health Effects of Family Violence
- Parent Abuse by Teenage Children
- Parent Abuse by Teenage Children (overview)
Control Freaks and Difficult People
Dominance
Elder Abuse
Emotional Abuse
Ethnic, Religious, and Cultural Resources
GLBT
Men
Narcissism
Organizations
Organizations - BDSM
Porn and Abuse/Aggression
Predators
- ‘Morning After’ Regret – Fourth in a Series on Predatory Behavior
- Defining It – First In a Series On Predatory Behavior
- Personal Responsibility – Third in a Series on Predatory Behavior
- The War Against False Entitlement – Second in a Series on Predatory Behavior
- What do they look like? – Fifth in a Series on Predatory Behavior
PTSD
Rape
Rape and Sexual Assault/Abuse
Recovering From Abuse
Red Flags
Ritual Abuse
Sex
Sexual Addiction
Sexuality
Submission
Tags
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Pages
Monthly Archives: January 2011
Master – Who Gets to Decide?
The title of master should be given and not self appointed. This applies on both the individual and the group scene level. He who calls himself a “master” of anything is most likely not. He whom *many* other people think … Continue reading
Posted in Abuse - General, Dominance
1 Comment
Formatting Query – Feedback Request
I’ve started experimenting a bit with different formatting here, and highlighting some passages in different colors on longer posts, given that I’ve realized how hard these pages actually are to read, with such tiny fonts. I’ve started looking for a … Continue reading
Posted in Uncategorized
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Keeping Things From Past Relationships
Letters, photos, emails, gifts – do you keep these things once a relationship ends, or are you more the type to destroy and get rid of it all? Why do you do what you do? I keep everything, and still … Continue reading
What To Do About a Dangerous Top? What If They Are a Community Leader?
Recently I bottomed to a well-known, fairly high-profile member of the Bay Area’s leather community, and I was very upset to find that in real play this person did not live up to the high standards of safety and consensuality … Continue reading
Posted in Abuse and BDSM, Bottoming, How to spot an abuser, red flags
Tagged abuse, abuser, bottom, community leader, consensuality, dangerous, dominant, mentor, safety, top, unsafe, walking your talk
7 Comments
Being An Asshole, or Topping From the Bottom?
Thank you to Devastating Yet Inconsequential for permission to repost this post. My comments are below the double line. topping from the bottom Can we please, please retire this concept? Listen, there is such a thing as being an asshole in … Continue reading
Posted in Abuse and BDSM, Dominance, Submission
Tagged abuse vs bdsm, bottom, Dominance, dominant, healthy relationship, M/s, master, power and control, self respect, slave, Submission, submissive, TFTB, top, topping from the bottom, TPE
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25 Characteristics of a Leader
25 Characteristics of a Leader (This also makes a great list of qualities for a good dominant.) 1. A leader is trustworthy. 2. A leader takes the initiative. 3. A leader uses good judgment. 4. A leader speaks with authority. … Continue reading
Posted in Dominance
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