Category Archives: Abuse – General

No Arrest, It Didn’t Happen? What If “Everybody Loves Him”? Abuse and Pillars of the Community


Believe it or not, there are people out there who actually believe that if no arrests are made, and no one goes to jail, that that means that no abuse could possibly have occurred, no matter what any of the … Continue reading

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Forgetting


I’ve written some about forgetting to do things one has promised and whether or not it is abusive, and I’d like to add some thoughts to that specifically about what it means when a submissive forgets to do something she … Continue reading

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Collecting Newbies


Why is it that some abusers seem to make a habit of collecting all kinds of newbies as friends in places like Fetlife and elsewhere in the scene? “All kinds” translating to “very young, hot girls”.  Lots of very young, … Continue reading

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Drama


Cool – the Urban Dictionary published my definition of drama!  See page 6, #36. It’s also what bystanders call it when they don’t know what the hell they’re talking about, especially because they weren’t there.  Too bad I forgot to … Continue reading

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Controlling Men Could Face Criminal Charges


Deputy Prime Minister Nick Clegg of the UK wants to “…make abusive behaviour by men a criminal offence, even if it does not involve physical violence), according to the Sunday Mirror. He also wants to extend the law to include … Continue reading

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What Would You Dump Someone Immediately For?


Is there anything a partner (or other person in your life) could do that would cause you to dump them immediately? And are there things you’ve said you would never give a second chance for that you not only have … Continue reading

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WomensLaw.org


I just discovered an absolutely fantastic legal resource targeted at women who are victims of domestic violence.  A project of the National Network to End Domestic Violence, WomensLaw.org, is probably the most comprehensive website I’ve come across dedicated to this … Continue reading

Posted in Abuse - General, Abuse - Getting Help & Staying Safe, Abuse - Verbal, Abuse and BDSM, Legal Definitions, Rape & Sexual Assault, Victims of Abuse | 3 Comments

When Is Abuse Not Abuse?


One of the things that has struck me as I read and learn more about abuse is how so much of the literature on the subject seems to pathologize a lot that is either entirely normal, or which can easily … Continue reading

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Survivors’ Nightmares


Do you have nightmares about your abuse?  Have a partner who does?  Take a look at the article “Almost all survivors will have nightmares while healing: How to  help your survivor partner during nightmares” for some helpful ideas about how … Continue reading

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The Problem of Being Too Nice


This is a lot of food for thought, as one of the problems for people who are abused is that they are often too nice, unable to stand up for themselves, willing to put themselves in damage in order to … Continue reading

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