Category Archives: Dominance

The Nature of Dominance


In a blog about the difference between BDSM and abuse, establishing matters such as the need for the dominant to live up to his own standards and to make sure he keeps in mind that he is dealing with a … Continue reading

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Protected: Is It Possible for a Dominant to Be Too Indulgent?


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Protected: Punishment – or Deal With Root Problem?


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Master – Who Gets to Decide?


The title of master should be given and not self appointed. This applies on both the individual and the group scene level.  He who calls himself a “master” of anything is most likely not.  He whom *many* other people think … Continue reading

Posted in Abuse - General, Dominance | 1 Comment

Being An Asshole, or Topping From the Bottom?


Thank you to Devastating Yet Inconsequential for permission to repost this post.  My comments are below the double line. topping from the bottom Can we please, please retire this concept? Listen, there is such a thing as being an asshole in … Continue reading

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25 Characteristics of a Leader


25 Characteristics of a Leader (This also makes a great list of qualities for a good dominant.) 1. A leader is trustworthy. 2. A leader takes the initiative. 3. A leader uses good judgment. 4. A leader speaks with authority. … Continue reading

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It’s the Internet, Stupid! How the Online World Encourages Abuse in the BDSM Subculture


I received a private message from someone who was commenting on how BDSM per se doesn’t inspire abuse, but that “…people watch vids on the internet, get it into their heads that subs are just human punching bags that will … Continue reading

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A Field Guide to Creepy Dom


ByGaystapo, aka Asher Bauer, reposted with permission: 1. Introduction This is a public service announcement for the BDSM and kink community. It is especially directed at anyone relatively new, and extra especially at anyone who ever bottoms. For the benefit … Continue reading

Posted in Abuse and BDSM, Dominance, How to spot an abuser | 15 Comments

Having a D/s Relationship – Why She Wants to Be Submissive


I did not write this, but found it out in the blogosphere.  Apparently it’s going around, but it is not known who wrote it.  I don’t agree with every single point, but for the most part, it rings true, and … Continue reading

Posted in consensuality, Dominance, Submission | 8 Comments

Dealing With Anger While Playing, and By Playing


How do you deal with anger when it comes up in a scene?  Or when wanting to find a way to release it to start with? My friend DaddyDarin weighed in the subject in a thread entitled How to release … Continue reading

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