Tag Archives: top

How You Can Help Combat the Abuse Problem


A newbie I met the other day told a tale of being abused or having her limits violated when playing with someone she said is well known at the Citadel, our local community playspace.  She said she’d like to get … Continue reading

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What To Do About a Dangerous Top? What If They Are a Community Leader?


Recently I bottomed to a well-known, fairly high-profile member of the Bay Area’s leather community, and I was very upset to find that in real play this person did not live up to the high standards of safety and consensuality … Continue reading

Posted in Abuse and BDSM, Bottoming, How to spot an abuser, red flags | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | 7 Comments

Being An Asshole, or Topping From the Bottom?


Thank you to Devastating Yet Inconsequential for permission to repost this post.  My comments are below the double line. topping from the bottom Can we please, please retire this concept? Listen, there is such a thing as being an asshole in … Continue reading

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Dealing With Anger While Playing, and By Playing


How do you deal with anger when it comes up in a scene?  Or when wanting to find a way to release it to start with? My friend DaddyDarin weighed in the subject in a thread entitled How to release … Continue reading

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On the Use of Labels in the BDSM World


This has become more and more of a pet peeve for me over the past several years. No one fits neatly into any of these little boxes, in my experience. Even those who most seem to always have elements that … Continue reading

Posted in Bottoming, Dominance, masochism, sadism, slavery, Submission | Tagged , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

Protected: Breaking the Rules


There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.

Posted in Abuse and BDSM, Dominance, Rants, Submission | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Alternative Sexual Practices – Kent State article response


first posted 9/17/06 @ 5:34 PM EST; updated 12/17/09 =============================== In response to the 9/14/06 article in the Kent State “Stater Online” entitled “Alternative sexual practices abound among college students“, I would like to offer these remarks. While it is … Continue reading

Posted in Abuse and BDSM, agreements, consensuality, Dominance, masochism, sadism, Submission | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment